F E N I M O R E
CAUTION: IDIOT BLOGGING
Jimmy Fenimore
Time to hang it up Britney.
This got me thinking. It's also a sad day for America when a girl at 27 looks old, washed up, and down. Is this what it's coming to? Teenagers or nothing? I fear we are turning into Iran or something. Where people will be stalking 14 year olds, wifeing them up at 18, divorcing them at 28 and starting over. Don't get me wrong, I'd still like to "date" Ms. Spears for a 45 minute to 6 hour period, but I wouldn't sell body parts to do it anymore. Where do I go from here? Have I gotten that old that the sex symbol from my high school days is washed up? This is a defining moment in my life. When Jeter retires, all my heroes from when I was kid will have retired, and the Sex Symbol from my generation will be gone. Where do I go from there? I can't start looking at Miley Cyrus, that girl is like 12! You can be locked up for just thinking about her in that sort of way! Should I call it quits? Just give up? Move to Africa and help Sangalan children build a school? I don't know. I'm lost. Just as news was getting better with the Stock Market going up, I see these pictures. A dark day for America. A dark day indeed.
Man-Ram Signs!
Cubs, Dodgers, Phillies, and Mets in the playoffs? Sounds about right. We all know baseball is a little wacky and at least one of those teams don't make the post season, probably two of them.
MLBTradeRumors.com is a great site for the latest signings and deals. Check it out.
What's better then Bauer Hour? Bauer TWO Hours!
-Janice, oh Janice. We have two hours to off you! Fingers Crossed!
- Watching the previews, that wheel chair lady is annoying. I hope she's off now that "Everything is going to change!"
- Oh yeah, "Next time you point a gun at me, you better be prepared to use it." That will be in my wedding vows.
- General Juma, I like him already.
- Someone has to have a running count of how many times Jack has pulled a gun on one of his team members. My guess would be somewhere over 2,000. The sleeper hold was a nice touch though.
- Janice vs. Chloe. Battle of the nerd chicks!
- How can you say Bauer isn't getting soft? A tazer? Back in the day he would have knee capped the guy, then questioned him.
- Speaking of running counts, that has to be the 15th time Chloe has been arrested.
- I take that back, because Jack can pull the trigger another 128 times before the battery dies! How do you not want to just take him out for a beer.
- I love the Senator lecturing Bauer. His Chief of Staff is a traitor and he's lecturing people.
- Unable to look evil in the eye! Bauer is the gaining momentum here.
- Arrest Bauer? What a joke. Bring back Palmer.
- I hope they say "Oh, your lawyer is here." And in walks Jack Bauer, hell even Bill Buchanan would be good.
- Question. Where the hell are you taking a boat in D.C.?
- Which also makes me think, the White House should have a moat. Gators and all. That would be awesome. I'd run for President if there was a moat.
-Renee swims funny.
- Hour 1, over. Not much has changed. Get ready for some madness!
- I forgot about Aaron! Bauer, Aaron, Bill all in the White House at once? Juma has no idea what he's getting himself into.
- I'm just spit balling here, but I think the reason The First Daughter hates her mom is because she caught her having an affair with the Chief of Staff.
- At least that state trooper got a line in the show before he was killed.
- I know you think this is far fetched, the whole getting into the White House thing, but Iran has the specs to Marine One. So, why not?
- Once again the Sh@@ hits the fan so we turn to Bauer.
- They just took the wrong hostage.
- There has to be protocol for when the President is taken hostage. That can't be it.
- I think the whole White House should be wired with sleeping gas. So if this did happen, you just gas everyone.
- Jon Voight! Grandfather to all of Angelina's refugees!
- Don't think I didn't know Voights little friend is Lucas from Empire Records! Or the stoner from Dazed and Confused!
- How dare the President ask about Kim Bauer.
- Didn't Jack disable the door? How come he can open it now?
- There is a better then excellent chance Bauer is going to go nutty.
- Next weeks episode looks good. Should have listened to Bauer.
Yankees vs. USA!
A woman calls 911 THREE times because McDonalds was out of McNuggets. She is now locked up. Take it from me. I know when you really want something to eat, and have your mind set on something like McNuggets, you need those damn McNuggets. So freaking out at the counter would have been cool. But calling 911? Come on. There are much greater things 911 needs to deal with. Such as the other day Subway was out of wheat bread. How are you out of wheat bread! It's like the most used bread ever! You are a sub shop! Get your damn act together Jared. How the hell are Americans going to lose 200 lbs like you did without wheat bread! Link of the Mc911er.
After listening to it, this lady is right. They wouldn't refund her money. They promised her nuggets, she paid for nuggets, but there's no nuggets! Give her the damn money back! That is criminal! She got arrested for this? That's a joke. I hope whoever arrested her gets canned.
In Fort Worth Texas guards are being charged with having sex with inmates. I don't really see a problem here. Unless the Judge specifically said "Not only are you doing 3-6 years in prison, you can have no contact with other human beings or animals (after all, they are criminals, who knows what their into.)" If you have a consenting guard, and a consenting inmate, why not let them bump uglies? It's my experience when people are having "physical" relationships, they tend to be happy and less violent. I would think this is a good practice for prisons. Instead of making a jail house shiv to kill a rival inmate, you get to use your shiv for other things. Ohhhh! Who says inmates and guards can't get along?
You may have heard about this crap. And it really ticks me off. Some actors went to Iran, yes THAT Iran to talk to leaders about God knows what. Now, I'm not sure Iran is considered an "Enemy of the State" but if it is, isn't this treason? By law, you're not allowed to visit an enemy country unless you are an elected official charged with the duty by the government. Not to mention, who the hell do these people think they are? You want to send Deniro? Fine. Pacino? Let's do it. Nobody messes with those two. Who do they send? Annette Bening? Are you serious? She hasn't been relevant since 1990, and even then, the jury is still out. If Iran thinks we're a country made of people like this, they will be sending bombs over here in no time. We have to let them know NOBODY is like these softies. Send 50 Cent over there, let them think we're all gangsta's with bullet proof vests, AK47's and hummers. They will want no part of us. I also love how these actors stick up for Iran and Venezuela. We should start treating them the way those countries treat their people. Watch how quick they scurry back to La La land. Get a real job and be quiet. All to self important actors.
When I saw this story, I was shocked. Then I realized it happened in Washington State. Kind of par for the course up there. A mother took a baseball bat and nailed a sex offender with it. (This is not the shocking part.) She got three months in jail. (That was.) She accused him of molesting her daughters, (I don't think he actually did) and struck him with the bat. Three months in jail? I say, if you're a sex offender. I mean a real one. Not someone who was 19 and their girlfriend was 17. ::Cough Cough::. I'm talking one of these real low lives that goes after children. I think you should be fair game as a pinata for the rest of your natural life. In fact, I think the kids you abused should get the first cracks, then they get to be the one to blind fold and spin the participants. (My reason for this is, they can really not spin them and put the blind fold on loose if you know what I mean). But, Washington is ass backwards and lucky they're still part of the Union. Unfortunately, they are closer to the D.C. mentality then we are. Swing batter batter batter.
So this has been making some news lately. In Maine some half genius, half deranged guy opened a topless coffee shop. Having both men and women servers, it's an equal opportunity pectoral showcase. At first, I loved the idea. If the coffee was good anyway. I mean, boobs are great and all, but nothing makes up for a bad cup of coffee. There is one major flaw in this little plan. Coffee spills, it splashes and it burns...bad. After a week of working at this place, you're not going to want to look at any of these people with all their 2nd degree burns and welts on their bodies. I say, nice initiative man, but the plan is flawed. Keep thinking outside the box though. I'd like to see topless bank tellers. That may get me to put my money back in the vault. Coffee + Boobs = well I don't know what it equals.
Hit me up!
I didn't watch 24 last night. I have it on the DVR and plan on watching it within the next 90 minutes, I will live blog the show this week, so check back later for more. Until then, e-mail me some good stuff, JimmyFenimore@gmail.com. Get it? Got it. Good.
People liked the dumb and dumber clip yesterday. Question? Can you triple stamp a double stamp? I just don't know...
How much would this suck?
I can't figure out what the worse feeling is, being the goalie or being a player wanting to kill the goalie. You make the call. JimmyFenimore@gmail.com. Click it good, click it right, click it every day and night.
Snow Day!
Boy do I love a good old fashioned snow day. The definition of an old fashioned snow day is simple. When nobody goes to work period. The only people that get there are the city dwellers and people that are absolutely looney tunes. Yes, I know it's March. I know you are all sick and tired of this crapola. You know what? Enjoy it one last time. Grab your snow gear and hit the sleds. Maybe just grab the one you love and build a snow man, maybe even get in a snowball fight...
Entertainment Podcast!
Hit me up at JimmyFenimore@gmail.com. If you can't listen to the whole thing, I suggest the second half. Shannon has a great story for all you kids out there. A lesson in, well I don't know what you can learn from it. But it's damn funny.
Download | Duration: 00:51:36
Quick hits on a slow Friday...
Here is an article about hate music that is found on mainstream sites like itunes. I'm a big freedom of speech guy, and I should be considering I blog. That being said, freedom of speech doesn't have to transcend into the private sector. Therefor, itunes should probably pull white power music. While they're at it, get Chris Brown off too.
Anyone else out there watching the new 90210? Well people must be. Hot off the heels of the "new" 90210's success, the CW green lights a "new" Melrose Place! I don't remember the show too much, only that Princess Vespa was a main stay of the cast. "Great. That's all we need. A drewish princess!" I also recall it was very sexual and borderline soft core status. I don't think the CW will be able to air that kind of show. I predict a huge flop on their end, but who knows. Maybe 1 million viewers is all they're trying to pull. Check out the story on THR.Com.
What's with models? I think they're like the Wide Receivers of the entertainment world. Absolutely bat Sh@# crazy. They not only throw temper tantrums, but they throw cell phones and other objects trying to inflict pain on people less beautiful then them. Lady, you won. You're a model and have teenage boys around the world dying to "be" with you. No need to make other peoples lives that much worse then yours. My humble opinion on why they're crazy? The rest of us get to eat pizza. And pizza is damn good. Check out this story about a model cutting a chick with a wine glass. I told you. Bat sh@# crazy.
Chicago Man Mails Obama H.I.V.
FNC: A man from President Obama's hometown of Chicago has been arrested for allegedly sending Obama and his staff envelopes containing HIV-infected blood, in the hopes of killing or harming them. It's only the second time ever that HIV-infected blood has been sent with malicious intent through the U.S. mail system, a spokesman for the U.S. Postal Inspection Service said.
Well, well, well. Look at what we got here. I was talking to a friend yesterday and she brought up someone freaking out about a possible Obama assassination due to the economy. I said that would be the most thought out, rational assassination in the history of this country. If you look back, we have a guy who was pissed he didn't get a job for the President. Someone who thought he was fighting on behalf of the communist cause, or against the communist cause. I think that one is still up in the air. An attempt on Reagan because someone wanted to get the attention of Jodi Foster so they would fall in love. No, really. You didn't know that? Jodi Foster! She was cute back then, but not worth killing for. The one that actually makes the most sense was Lincoln. You had a guy who loved the south and hated the North. He had actually planned on a kidnapping the President but the war was over. So he conspired to kill Lincoln, The VP and the Sec. of State. As horrible as it was, it was the most rational and made the most sense. So I can't see someone attacking Obama with gun fire because he spends money like a drunken sailor. Can't see it.
However, for arguments sake, let's look at this plan. For starters, everything that gets sent to government buildings goes through a factory where any DNA in letters dies. True. Second, blood with HIV living outside the body I think only survives a few days at most. So, I hope this guy over-nighted it. Three, somehow the blood would have had to entered Obama's body. Good luck getting him to actually read your letter. Fourth, if Magic Johnson can live forever with HIV, I'm pretty sure Obama will live longer if he gets HIV. Actually, I'm not just sure, I'm HIV positive!