FOX: JACKSON, Ohio —  Police say an angry 4-year-old Ohio boy grabbed a gun from a closet and shot his baby sitter. Eighteen-year-old Nathan Beavers was hospitalized Sunday with minor wounds to his arm and side after the shotgun attack. Police say another teen was also injured. Witnesses told police the child was angry because Beavers accidentally stepped on his foot. Beavers was watching the child at a mobile home in Jackson with several other teenagers and several other children. Jackson County Sheriff John Shashteen says authorities are investigating. The child has not been charged.

I don't claim to be some super investigator or anything, but I am pretty super. That's just a fact of life. This story is full of riddles, wrapped in enigmas. Stepped on a four year olds foot? It's easier to step on their head. Several other teenagers and several other children? Were they each responsible for a kid or was this one teenager baby sitting all the kids and had his friends over? Last but not least, the baby sitter was a dude? That's straight creeper folks. At first glance the untrained eye may be thinking something sexual. Maybe a child prostitution ring, perhaps some web cast type thing on the net. You have not looked at all the evidence. How do you step on a 4 year olds foot? They are obviously teaching these kids how to dance. I know when people try to make me dance I want to cap them with a shot gun. Why such a secret though? Well most places with mobile homes like Jackson county are a lot like the town in Footloose. There is no dancing allowed. So these teenagers offer to baby sit to "make some extra money" but in reality they are training the younger generation to dance. Because hey, if they don't do it, nobody will. Then they would have no chance of having a prom. Pretty much a standard case. We see it a lot around these parts.

Oh yeah, playing chicken with a tractor? The only way to settle a dispute over a woman.